Effective Ways to Validate Your Child’s Emotions

Explore ways to validate your child’s emotions.

8 Ways To Validate Your Child’s Emotions

Emotional intelligence is the cornerstone of healthy development in a child.

As parents, one of the most powerful ways we can support our children is by validating their emotions. Both big and small emotions.

Now, giving validation to their feelings doesn’t mean you always need to agree with their feelings or actions. Instead, you are showing them that their emotions are acknowledged and respected.

Here are some practical ways to validate your child’s emotions and foster their emotional well-being.

1. Listen Actively

Active listening is the first step in validating your child’s emotions. This means giving them your full attention, without interrupting or jumping to solutions or conclusions.

When your child is upset or excited, pause what you are doing, make eye contact, and listen to their words and feelings. Reflect on what they’ve told by asking thoughtful questions such as, for example -, “It sounds like you’re a bit upset because your sister doesn’t want to play with you right now.”

This simple act of listening can make your child feel heard and understood.

2. Acknowledge Their Feelings

It’s important to recognize and name your child’s emotions.

Instead of you naming their emotions you can ask them to share how they are feeling with you. If their vocabulary is not fluent enough then perhaps you can consider saying something along the lines of – “You’re mad because your tower was so tall and then suddenly it broke.”

By naming the emotion your child is experiencing, you are in turn helping your child to understand and articulate their feelings, which is crucial for their emotional development.

3. Validate, Don’t Dismiss

Avoid dismissing or minimizing your child’s emotions, even if they seem trivial to you because something that is trivial to you is a big deal to them.

Phrases like, “That’s ok, don’t fuss over it,” or “Get over it,” can make your child feel invalidated.

Instead, you can consider empathizing with their experience. Perhaps you could say, “I know it’s really disappointing when plans change. It’s okay to feel upset about it.”

This approach helps your child feel that their emotions are legitimate and worthy of attention and will openly share with you the next time they are feeling emotions.

4. Encourage Emotional Expression

Create a safe space for your child to express their feelings without fear of judgment.

Encourage your child to talk about their emotions, draw pictures, or perhaps through play to express how they feel.

For instance, if your child is anxious about going to a friend’s birthday you might say, “It’s normal to feel nervous when going to new places. Let’s talk about what you’re worried about and how we can handle it together.”

5. Model Emotional Validation

Children learn by example. By validating your own emotions and handling them appropriately, you can teach your child how to manage their feelings.

Share your own emotional experiences with them, such as, “I had a long day at work today and I am feeling a bit stressed.  It helps me to talk about it and deep breaths help me ease the tensions I’m feeling.”

This modeling shows them that it’s okay to have and express emotions.

6. Use Positive Reinforcement

When your child successfully manages their emotions or expresses themselves clearly, acknowledge and praise their efforts. Positive reinforcement can be as simple as saying, “You shared your feelings so clearly and calmly today.”

This encouragement boosts their confidence in handling emotions and reinforces positive behavior.

7. Offer Comfort and Reassurance

Sometimes, children need physical comfort to help them feel validated. A hug, a comforting touch, or simply sitting close can provide the reassurance they need. If your child is upset about a difficult situation, offer them comfort and say, “I’m here for you, and we’ll get through this together.”

8. Address Their Feelings with Solutions

Once you’ve validated your child’s emotions, help them explore possible solutions or coping strategies.

For example, if your child is feeling overwhelmed with building a tower for example – you can consider guiding them step by step on how to build their tower.

This not only validates their feelings but also empowers them to handle challenges effectively.

9. Use Self Regulation Worksheets 

Alternatively, you can consider having a toolbox with self-regulation worksheets that you can provide to your child where they can use activities to help them identify their feelings.

These self-regulation worksheets are designed to guide children in recognizing and managing their feelings, with engaging activities providing the tools they need to navigate their emotions effectively.

Supporting your child/students in understanding themselves better and developing crucial self-regulation skills.

Shop Self-Regulation Worksheets

Conclusion

Validating your child’s emotions is a powerful way to support their emotional development and strengthen your bond. By actively listening, acknowledging their feelings, and modeling emotional intelligence, you help your child navigate their emotions with confidence.

Validation isn’t about fixing problems or taking over for your child but rather showing your child that their emotions matter.

Through these eight practices, you’ll help build a foundation of trust, empathy, and resilience that will benefit your child throughout their life.

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• How to empower the little girls in your life

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